THE SON BURSTS FORTH
THE DAWN HAS COME
THE SON ARISES
GONE IS THE DARKNESS
THE SON OF GOD LIVES
HE IS ALIVE!
HE WALKS IN MY HEART!
HE IS ALIVE!
Happy Easter Sunrise!
My ROCK
“The Lord is my Rock, my Fortress, and my Deliverer. My God is my Rock in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my Stronghold. In whom I will trust.
I will call upon the name of the Lord who is worthy to be praised.” (from Ps. 18:2-3)
March 10th, 2012, in the wee hours of the morning, before the dawn, when the night was the darkest, Jesus carried my son Stephen Shimpei Sakaguchi tenderly in His arms to Heaven.
We don’t know what turmoil was in his heart that night or what confusion invaded his mind through alcohol, but we know that now, today, he is free.
He had Jesus in his heart and he believed in a God who would send His only Son to die on a cross for his sins. That God did not forsake him in his darkest hour. That God did not leave him to his own devises. No his God, my God, carried Stephen home.
Now my dear son walks and talks with Jesus every day! He runs across the mountains that he loves so much with his dad, Jim. He rides on the back of racing horses with his grandpa, Vern. He walks in a lovely garden that has many flowers with his grandma, Gloria. He plays a game with his other Gramma, Jeanne and jokes with Grampa Hank, He laughs with friends, cousins, aunts, and sings with many new family members. He worships his God on bowed knee and sings praises forever!
My son, my son. Oh how shattered is my heart. How many are the broken pieces. How empty my arms.
People ask me how I’m doing and this is what I want to say:
It’s hard but my God is harder. He is my Rock!
It’s tough but my God is tougher. He is my mighty Fortress!
I want to run away but my God runs faster. He is my Deliverer!
I want to dissolve into a puddle of tears, but my God holds me in His hands. He’s my strength!
I am scared of what else may come my way, but my God is in control, nothing can touch me that he does not allow. He is my Shield!
My legs are weak so I can not walk, but my God stands beside me. I lean on Him. He is the strength of my salvation.
I want to die inside, but my God keeps my spirit alive. He is my song! He is my life! He fills me with love! He is my joy! He is my Stronghold!
I will trust in my God! All the days of my life.
“I will call upon the Lord who is worthy to be praised.” I will praise Him forever and ever!
But that is so long and folks really don’t want to hear all of it, not only that words flow freely from my pen (or key board) but get stuck in my throat. So I say, “It’s hard, really hard, but I have a Rock to lean on and my Rock carries me when I can’t go on.”
Here’s a thought from Friday, April 5:
Walking in God’s strength. Riding on the wings of His peace. Dwelling in His love. Soaring on Praise. The only way!
Can’t believe it’s been four weeks since my world turned upside down. Funny, seems life should have stopped! But it doesn’t, does it? Time just keeps on going. Without my loved one. Wait stop the world! I don’t want life to go on without him! But it does. Doesn’t it? plodding day after plodding day.
Okay if it’s gotta go on then speed it up. Make time go fast. Zoom things up. Fast forward to the time when I am going home. Flying to Glory. Seeing my son standing there arms outstretched, quirky grin on his dimpled face, saying, “It’s about time, Mom!”
But then I can’t leave John so that can’t happen until he’s there too. All in God’s time. Right? God’s time. God’s hands. God’s plans. That’s the way we go. Living each day as it comes for His Glory and nothing more, nothing less. Living each day in His love. Nothing more, nothing less. That’s all there is. That’s all I need. He’s all I need. Praise God!
Saturday, the day before
They have no name for this day. The day our Savior was in the grave. The day He went down to Hades and fought for our souls. The day the disciples cried for their leader, their friend. The day His mother wept for her Son. I wonder if the sun shone on that day. Black Saturday I think I’ve heard it called. Dark. Bleak. Hopeless.
They didn’t know that in a few short hours the dawn would break forth! The dawning of the ages. The morning to beat all mornings! The morning Jesus bursts from the grave! Our Savior snaps the bonds of death and glorious light floods a dark world. The Light shines on our lives, in our souls!
He IS ALIVE!
We don not know when the dawn will come, but come it will. Darkness may fill your life today, but light will spring forth! The storm always passes, the night comes to an end, the sun rises in a burst of glory! The dawn always comes.
There is always hope. God will do a new thing. I will sing a new song. I do not serve a dead Lord. My God is ALIVE! Hope springs forth from the grave!
“He will light my lamp, my God will enlighten the darkness!” (Ps. 18:28)
He is ALIVE! Rejoice!
He LIVES! Sing Praises!
He ARISES above all evil! Thank You Jesus!
He gives LIGHT in the darkness! Hallelujah!
He is the Deliverer! Glory to God!
He is the LOVER of my soul and the LIFTER of my head! Praise be to God my Mighty Fortress!
He is ALIVE! REJOICE!
Prairie Wind 
So glad that you lean on the Lord for strength Wendy. I can’t imagine what people who do not have faith in God do in a case like this. You have such a positive outlook through all of your pain. God Bless You and give you strength. It is comforting to know that God has a plan for all of us and we just need to learn to be patient and listen “Be Still and Know That I Am God” . I know you are very familiar with that, I can see it in your photos. Love You!
Love Donna
Beautifully written Wendy. I love reading your blogs. May you continue to lean on your Rock and please keep sharing your gift of writing. I love you!
Mur
Thanks you guys. Oh yes, Donna, God IS in control. Now and always. Forever and forever. Yes, He has a plan and nothing is random. There is no darkness He can not overcome. Stephen walks with Him. His life on earth has been completed but his purposes for God continue. He has been made whole. He is now complete and ready to serve his God in the way he was created to. The light of Jesus now overshadows the darkness. Light shines in my life. Good things will happen. I know that and I feel it now. I will still miss my son, but God is giving me a song. Mur, I can not help the writing, it pours out of me. As you can see. I can not express my heart with the spoken word, so this is how it comes out. Ha! Watch out! Now cuz of blogs and Face Book you all hear it! Love you much Wendy
Wendy, I don’t write well… I have so much admiration for those who do. And your writing skills, I so admire. Beyond just that, I admire your faith and your ability to share it. God only allows some things to exist in the lives of certain of His children. Those He can count on. Bless you for what you give to me and all who know you, and all who get to share your blog. You are one of God’s special children.
Jim, Wow! I’m a bit speechless, words fail, but wait a minute, somethings coming to me—–
I feel as if my faith has been pounded into me like stakes into a frozen ground. I resist, I fight, I push it away but God is persistant. Praise Him! Without my faith in a loving, All mighty, All knowing God I would surely sink in the mirey clay. Believing that He is in control and knows what is best for us beyond our understanding and that HE is working for our good is a necessity for my survival in this life. My faith in my God is my life line, my life perserver, the only way I can go on. I am not strong, I have a strong God. Special? No, but I am being refined and I pray I will come out like polished gold that will reflect Gods’ glory. Like I said I’m speechless, but thanks a lot Brother, it means a lot from you. You’ve walked through the fire a bit too, seems some refining going with you guys.