Hunting Camp, Dudes and Horses 3

Posted on December 12, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

Note: This is a continuation of Hunting Camp, Dudes and Horses 2, He Makes A Way Part 1, Evacuation. If you have not read that previous story you need to do that before reading this one.

My Kitchen in the cook tent, where I prepared countless meals

My Kitchen in the cook tent, where I prepared countless meals

Evacuating base camp Dec. 2, 1996

Evacuating base camp Dec. 2, 1996

HE MAKES A WAY
Part 2
To The Mark

“For You will light my lamp. The Lord my God will enlighten my darkness. For by you I can run against a troop. By my God, I can leap over a wall.” Ps. 18:28-29

“No,” John told me, “we won’t eat here, lets pick something up in Superior.” So seeing as to the great urgency to drive to St. Regis and talk to our realtor about the offer on our place, I consented. Also, after many weeks in the wilderness a dinner out would be nice.

After our hunters had taken off, after getting the horses fed and watered, after Ginger and Dan had left in a chained up Jeep, we decided to drive to St. Regis that evening. After all the next day we would need to be on the trail riding back to hunting camp to dig out the tents and pack out our gear. If, that is, it didn’t snow more and we could make it back into camp. Fortunately, the snow had stopped at the moment.

The dirt road was slick but not too bad, but when we got on the interstate, we found solid ice and it took us an hour to go the 20 some miles to Superior. As we pulled off the interstate at Superior, we noticed something odd, the town was dark. The Town Pump had a few lights running off a generator and we found out the power was out from the Montana border to Missoula and had been for 12 hours at least, due to heavy snows and an ice storm. Luckily, we were able to buy candy bars and pop.
Mistake number 6. Never believe my husband when he says we’ll get food soon.

We had gone that far so we made our slow way on to St. Regis and found our realtors house. Having no power they were sitting around gas lamps and a wood stove in the living room, eating stew. Not having anything substantial to eat since 6:00 that morning, I remember sitting on the couch focusing on that stew, wishing they would offer us some, but I remember very little else. Later I found out we had signed the papers to accept the offer on our house, and one condition of the offer was to include in the sale all the appliances in the house. Even the frig, washer, dryer and freezer. What?! I agreed to that! Not in my right mind!
Mistake number 7. Never sign business deals when weak and out of your mind from hunger and fatigue.

Still needing food and rest, we drove slowly back to our camp. I don’t remember an inch of the 40 miles on treacherous, slick roads since I was blissfully dreaming of the steak cutlasses waiting for us at the camper. Which I could have eaten raw at that moment.
“We’re home.” John’s voice shattered the lovely vision of a slightly rare bite of juicy steak going into my mouth.
“Oh good!” I cried as I jumped from the pickup, and after greeting two happy dogs, I got the lantern going in the camper, and fired up the burner to fry the steaks.
When John came in, he asked, “You want to eat this late?” I just stared at him.                    Mistake number 8. Never expect John to understand my need for food.
Ginger has her own version of this adventure and their long, harrowing drive to Plains. Go to her website http://www.virginaawork.com to read her version.

The next morning found us back in the saddle heading up the mountain trail under grey skies but no snow falling. Thank the Lord! After the experience of the day before, I had trepidations of heading back into the wilderness. Would we make it in and back out? Would the horses be nervous and jumpy? Would the snow hold off? What would happen if one of us got hurt? Fear assaulted me, and I prayed my way up the trail. They had told us in St. Regis that more snow was on the way, lots of snow, more snow than the country had seen in 30 years. The way seemed impassable, the job ahead of us of digging out tents and equipment, packing it up and out in the deep snow seemed impossible.

Once on the trail the sun came out, the horses were strong and steady, the weather felt balmy, my worries flew away on the wings of the hawk soaring above us. John pointed to an open hillside on the mountain above us and I saw several elk in a line making their way out of the high country. Among them were three bulls.
That night as we made our way down the trail with full pack horses, the moon came out and we heard the wild whistle of a bull elk in the timber. We made two more trips up that trail with the panyards dragging the snow and still the storm held off. We were able to get all our gear out of the wilderness and our horses and rigs out of the mountains and back home. When we pulled into our yard, however, it was snowing and the driveway was filled with three feet of snow.

The snow continued to come while we packed up our household and moved most of our belongings to a storage shed. It kept snowing while Christmas drew near and we waited for the deal on our house to close. It was still snowing when Stephen came home from Helena and we cut a tree in the yard and hung hand made ornaments on the tree in a nearly empty house and celebrated one of the best Christmases we ever had. I don’t know when it stopped snowing that year, but when we left Plains some time in January there was four feet of snow on the table we left in the yard.
God lightened our darkness by giving us a window in the storm to get our camp out of the mountains before the trails were completely snowed in. He enabled us to run against a troop and leap the wall of drying out gear, packing up and moving a household in two weeks. Yet, in an empty house, we waited one long month before the final papers were signed.

We were told we had two weeks to get out of the house, one of the conditions I unknowingly agreed upon the night I was out of my mind from food deprivation. Because things were not yet ready at the ranch in Trego, we took the horses to the ranch for the winter and purchased a used 36 foot 5fth wheel camper. After closing the door on our little rustic cabin in the woods for the last time, we drove two rigs, John pulling the 5th wheel and me in the Jeep with the dogs, to Darby MT where we became a tag-a-long logging family, living in an RV park, while John worked on a helicopter job. And so began a great adventure of another sort.

“In the shadow of His hand He has hidden me, and made me a polished arrow. In His quiver He has hidden me.” Is. 49:2
One bright sunny morning as the two dogs lay sprawled on most of the camper floor space, I looked out one window at the RV next door. Looking out the window on the other side, I saw, just 20 feet away, another camper. At 4:00 that morning as on all weekday mornings, I had heard the engine of a neighbor’s pickup running, in fact many pickups running, including John’s. I could hear the sounds of children yelling, dogs barking TV’s playing and constant traffic on the nearby highway. I dropped my head into my arms on the table.

“Oh God!” I cried, “if only I was back in those snowed in mountains where it was at least quiet!”
I was depressed, down, discouraged and unhappy. I need wide open spaces, room to roam, privacy and peace. Here I was cramped in between trailers, with people coming and going constantly. I had nothing to do except clean the camper over and over. Doing the laundry in the nearby laundry mat was a highlight of my week.

“Lord why?” I moaned, “why did you bring us here? We’re supposed to be in Trego starting a new life on the ranch. Why are we in this RV court in Darby?”
“Is it no small thing that you should be my servant?”
“But I know no one! I have no friends, how can I be Your servant?”
“Remember, Child, You are my arrow, I am polishing you. I will send you to the mark.” (from Is. 49:2)

Lifting my head I looked out the window once again. There was a little boy playing in the space next to our trailer, I had seen his mother, a little younger than me, go in and out of her trailer next door.
  “Go make friends.” I heard in my mind.

There were women in the RV court in the same boat as I was, away from home, no friends, no family. What an opportunity. Jumping up and grabbing my coat I put a leash on Gabe my bloodhound and went outside. The little boy wanted to pet Gabe and Misti, my Golden, he had come over before when they were chained outside and asked to pet them. I now asked him if he would like to a take a little walk so Gabe could track him. When he said he did, I knocked on the door of the trailer next door to ask his mother permission.

Thus began a friendship. Most days the little boy would walk in the fields surrounding the court and hide in the tall grass or brush. Gabe and Misti, with me in tow, would follow his scent and delight him with lots of licking when they found him. Sometimes his mother would join him in making a trail. A lot of times we would end up visiting in one camper or the other for quite awhile afterwards. I found out she was indeed lonely and in need of friendship and I was able to share Jesus with her. Together we visited a couple other ladies in the court.

Luckily down there the snow was not very deep so I spent many hours a day walking with the dogs. Driving up a logging road into the nearby mountains I cross country skied or hiked many gorgeous trails, getting somewhat my quota of quiet and seclusion. One time I crossed a rushing creek on a snowed over log and when the snow gave out from under me, I just managed to grab an overhead limb to keep from falling off the log. I knew that falling in that creek probably would have been the end, with the fast rushing water pushing me under or hypothermia setting in, so I praised God for my guardian angel who lifted me up. And was more careful after that when I was in the middle of nowhere by myself.

One late afternoon just before dark I was in the camper and heard frantic yelling just outside. I saw a young girl on the main court road waving her arms and screaming something like, “Hurry hurry, he’s hurt bad!” Then I heard a siren and soon saw an ambulance come into the court and follow the girl and a man who had joined her. The next day I heard that a teen boy had been accidently shot and killed in one of the mobile homes in the court. He and his friend, a next door neighbor, were cleaning guns and the gun went off and he was hit in the head.

I prayed for the family especially his mother and the other boy. Then I had the idea to make supper for them. I mentioned it to my neighbor and she wanted to help so she made the desert and I made stew and roles. Together we carried it to the mobile home and knocked on the door. My heart pounded, I wasn’t sure this was the right thing to do. We didn’t know these people, what were they like, having suffered such a devastating loss, what condition would they be in?

The door was opened by a woman about my age, the grieving mother, and she greeted us warmly. She invited us in, accepted the food with much appreciation, and introduced us to another lady, who was the other boy’s mother. They told us the story and the mother said her son had died instantly without pain. There were tears, yes, but I was amazed to see those two women supporting and helping each other.

I had also written a letter and told them how God had gotten me through the loss of my husband a few years earlier and had written down some verses. A few weeks later I saw the mother in a consignment store in the court and she thanked me profusely for the letter and said it really encouraged her and gave her hope. We stood in that store and talked for a long time.

I was in a place I did not want to be, for no great purpose, doing nothing of value. So it seemed. Yet I wonder, was I there for such a reason as this?
God said, “You are my servant, Wendy, in whom I will be glorified.” (Is 49:3)
Imagine that! Almighty God being glorified in me! Amazing!

God makes my way perfect. The way may be a treacherous, snowy trail, an icy, highway, a slippery ride up the mountain and digging camp out of deep snow, or it may be a crowded, lonely RV court, or unimaginable tragedy, yet God has a plan. He has a mark, a target, He wants to send me to. He polishes, prepares and enables me. My job is to stay close to His side, always following His way, always in His quiver.
“They shall feed along the roads, and their pastures shall be on all desolate heights. They shall neither hunger nor thirst. Neither heat nor sun shall strike them. For He who has mercy on them will lead them, even by springs of water He will guide them. I will make each of My mountains a road and My highways shall be elevated.
Is. 49:9-11
Where there seems no way, He makes a way!

Back home at Hidaway Ridge near Plains. Let it Snow!

Back home at Hidaway Ridge near Plains. Let it Snow!

John just laughs!

John just laughs!

Still snowing!

Still snowing!

Four feet in our yard

Four feet in our yard

Christmas trees, one inside, one out.

Christmas trees, one inside, one out.

Misti and Gabe Inside the fifth wheel, pretty cozy

Misti and Gabe Inside the fifth wheel, pretty cozy

Home Sweet Home, not at the RV court. At my folks' home in Plains

Home Sweet Home, not at the RV court. At my folks’ home in Plains

View from the Bitterroots where I hiked. Bitterroot Valley

View from the Bitterroots where I hiked. Bitterroot Valley

Posted in Big snow year 1996, Comfort in Grief, Encouragement, Following God, God's servent, He makes a way, Hunting Camp, Outfitting in Montana, Sent to the mark | 4 Comments

Hunting Camp Dudes and Horses 2

Posted on November 20, 2013 by Wendy Kleker
Hunting camp

Hunting camp Cook tent on left, our sleeping tent in middle, hunters sleeping tent on right

HE MAKES A WAY

Have you ever looked at a mountain with slopes so steep you almost fell off your horse as you craned your neck to see the top, and wondered how in the world you and your horse would find a way up that timbered mountain? The trees are as thick as the hair on a bear’s back, the slope vertical with rock slides and cliffs, the way seems totally impossible. Yet, as you ride to the base of the slope, the timber opens up a few feet to reveal a trail that meanders and switch-backs and scrambles up that steep mountain. A trail all the way to the top.
Have you ever been in hunting camp deep in the wilderness when the snow is piling high on the tent sides and falling deep on the trails? When, somehow you have to get hunters, family, horses, dogs, and supplies to civilization before the mountain trails are completely impassable? Well John and I have and here’s the story.

Part 1 Evacuation
Sitting in the makeshift outhouse, which had a tarp wrapped around four trees, I enjoyed the open skylight view of snow laden fir trees and the feel of snow flakes falling gently on my upturned face. There was utter silence. I strained my ears but could not hear the usual twitter of snow birds or the bubbling of the creek or even the stomping of the horses. A deep hush had fallen on the mountains. I sighed and closed my eyes in the peacefulness of the winter wilderness. Suddenly with a plop, ice cold, wet snow covered my face, buried my lap and packed down my collar. My peace went flying out the tarp door and I made a sputtering exit from the outhouse, brushing off snow and swiping at my wet face. With my two dogs at my heels, I made fast tracks through the knee deep snow, back to the warmth of the wood stove in the big cook tent.

It had been snowing steadily for 24 hours and with snow piled half way up the 5 feet walls of the four tents we wondered how long we should stay in our hunting camp nestled 11 miles in the heart of the wilderness. John had taken the three hunters on horseback that morning saying they would be back before dark. As I tidied camp, cleaned the cook tent, watered, exercised and fed the remaining horses, I kept my eye on the sky and prayed they would make it back safe and sound.

I don’t remember what I fixed for supper that night, might have been fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, but between cooking and feeding the wood stove, I periodically glanced out the tent door at the rapidly dimming light and snow that seemed to be falling harder.

The fire in the stove crackled and Misti and Gabe sprawled in the dirt beside it, soaking up the warmth. I thought I heard voices. Gabe’s head came up, “Wooof”. Good, I thought, the guys are back. But wait a minute that sounds like a women’s voice! Gabe went to the tent door and stuck his head out wagging his long tail. A very familiar woman! What in the world!

I popped my head out the tent flap. Low and behold standing in the murky light, behind a curtain of snow, was my sister. Pulling my head back inside I shook it. Surely, I was seeing things. Gabe gambled outside and Misti dashed out barking excitedly. I peeked out the flap again and sure enough, there stood Ginger and her husband Dan bundled from head to toe in winter clothes, grinning from ear to ear. Way out here?! In the middle of no where?! How did they get here? I was speechless.

“Hi!” Ginger said breathlessly as if she was hoping beyond hope that this was the right place. Of course, it didn’t really matter, all she could see was the tent, shelter, warmth, maybe food.
“Looked like the Hilton!” She said later after telling us how they had hiked and trudged the long, hard way up that snowy trail, lost thier way and thought they would have to spend the night under the trees. “I never was so glad to see something in all my life!”

Later when they were soaking up the heat from the wood stove, the questions came. Where? How? And WHY? Of all places in the middle of the wilderness in a snow storm that would end up being the worst storm in that part of the country in 30 years, dumping record amounts of snow, causing power outages that lasted for days and locking the mountains up tight for the rest of the winter, causing many outfitters and hunters to loose equipment and rigs.

“Well,” Dan said, “you asked us to come in and tell you if you had an offer on your place.”

“Yeah?” I questioned. We had our property and cabin near Plains for sale since we planned to lease John’s uncle’s ranch and move to Trego MT.

“Well,” Dan says, “You have an offer.” Turns out it was a very good offer, for our asking price and it was urgent that we get back and sign papers ASAP. Urgent is urgent, you know.

About that time John came in with the hunters and after unsaddling and feeding horses, he ducked into the tent, stopped short, and said calmly, “Relatives! You just can’t get away from ’em!” Mistake number one. Never tell your relatives where you are going.

Later after everyone was warm, full and exceedingly satisfied, we spent a nice evening visiting and laughing accompanied by the occasional whoosh as the snow slid off the roof of the tent. Before going to our snug beds for the night, John said we would assess our situation in the morning. Ginger and Dan made warm beds in the cook tent, next to the wood stove with two dogs snuggled beside them.

Before dawn the next morning, I stuck my head out our sleeping tent and felt snow flakes on my face. “Still snowing,” I told John. All night I had heard the periodical whoosh of the snow sliding off the roof of the tent and had half expected the canvas sides to collapse under the weight.

Stepping over Ginger and Dan, I stoked up the wood stove and began breakfast preparations. Knowing there wouldn’t be any hunting this morning, we had slept in and dawn soon lightened the snow laddened sky. After our guests were up and John had fed the horses, he ducked into the tent, poured coffee from the pot on the stove and set down at the big picnic table.

“Well” he said slowly, “Since the tents are almost buried and the snow is now nearly three feet deep, we’ll go to plan B.”

Plan B consisted of packing up gear and what food we could take and getting the hunters, our relatives and the horses out of the mountains as soon as possible. We would get Ginger and Dan on their way back to Plains then settle in at the base camp where we had a wall tent set up and our camping trailer. We could hunt from there and it should be good hunting, John reasoned, since the elk would be pouring out of the high country.

So after a big breakfast, we all got busy packing. When I stepped outside in the light of day, I was amazed to see only the roofs of the four tents sticking out of the snow. The snow was indeed nearly up to my hips and I wondered how we would flounder our way down the 8 miles to the trail head where Ginger and Dan had left our Jeep. The hunters were in a panic and as soon as they had their gear packed, they left saying they could ride down the trail with no trouble. Mistake number two. Never, ever separate ranks.

When all three pack horses were loaded with gear and what food we thought we would need at base camp, we buttoned up the tents and with much prayer, embarked on the great expedition of evacuating the high country.

John led two pack horses in the front, Dan led another horse, Ginger rode our gentlest horse and I, with the two dogs, brought up the rear. I glanced back at our home-away-from-home snuggled amongst snow covered fir trees and wondered if I would ever see the tents in one piece again. With all the horses in front, I thought it would be easy going, but it was not. The churned up snow was still deep in the trail and slick in many places, covering rocks and roots that we tripped over. The packs on the horses drug in the snow on the sides of the trail. We were going basically downhill, but there were many canyons and hillsides to traverse up and down. Mistake number 3 never pack a horse when you can ride.

The horses were nervous and jumpy, due to the deep snow and being separated from the ones that went ahead. The borrowed pack horse tied on to Rocket, whom John led, was blind in one eye and spooky and when a branch behind him snapped he leaped forward, breaking the light twine and ran down the trail at full tilt with pack saddle flapping and snow flying.

We followed in his wake and before long, could see him ahead lying on his belly in the snow. As we neared, we saw red on the snow all around him and my heart was sickened. I thought for sure he had split his belly open and was bleeding out his life blood. However, he whinnied and tossed his head and as we walked up to him, we saw no wounds or flowing blood.
“What in the world?” I cried. John put some of the red snow in his mouth and laughed.
“Kool-Aid,” he said, “must have broken open in the pack.”

What a relief, however, Partner, was tangled in pack saddle ropes, cinches and his lead rope and in the process of untangling him John was kicked in the shin. Having gotten the pack saddle and the loaded panyards back on the quaking Appaloosa, we proceeded on down the long trail with me leading Partner. As it turned out Ginger could barely walk through the snow, so I let her ride the whole way out. However, she nearly froze to death since the snow had turned to near rain and before long all of us were soaked pretty much to the skin.

Soon after rescuing Partner, Rocket suddenly jumped ahead pulling the lead out of John’s hand and ran pell-mell down the trail. Oh my goodness! Soon, we came to a place where there was a steep bank of about 30 feet going down to the creek that had been trampled in a large area. We figured the hunters ahead of us had come to ill fate when Rocket had caught up to them and could only imagine what had happened. However since we did not find dead horses or dead bodies, we proceeded on down the trail, expecting at any moment to come upon some mangled form. After a short ways, we did see horses and hunters resting along the trail. Come to find out, Blue, who jumped when Rocket came running up behind, had fallen and rolled down the embankment. The hunter had jumped off and was okay, and Blue was unhurt, but the riffle had come out of the scabbard and was missing. After an extensive search, the riffle was found. Mystery solved. The whole concave continued slipping, sliding, and dragging on down the trail.

Snow plopped off a branch behind Partner and something very hard banged into my back, knocking me to the ground. I yelled and dear old Partner jumped back, having the sense not to run over the top of me. Thank the Lord! Mistake number 4. Never, ever borrow a blind horse. (I called him Powder cuz he was like a powder keg ready to blow)

John traded horses with me and I trudged on leading Rocket. My legs by this time felt like heavy blocks and I concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other, without slipping and prayed for strength to keep going. Suddenly something spooked Rocket and he jumped into me, kicking my ankle which, thank God, was protected by my heavy boot. I limped on down the trail muttering under my breath. And praying we would all make it out of the mountains alive, well and with no broken bones. Mistake number 5. Never name a horse Rocket. (We had a Stormy too, but that’s another story)

I knew it was not far to the trail head where the Jeep was waiting. Ahh for soft seats, warm heater and four wheels that do not kick or knock you down. Poor Ginger was shaking and barely able to stay on Dusty. Soon the Jeep came into sight. My hopes fell, it was buried almost to the windows in snow.

John tried, but it would not budge, so he suggest us girls stay inside with the motor running and heater going while the guys hiked and rode the three miles to base camp. They were barely out of sight and Ginger started to pull off her wet and frozen clothes, replacing them with dry ones she had in the Jeep.

“Do you have any food in here?” I asked, rummaging around my pack to no avail. We had eaten the few snacks I had brought on the trail. Looking at my watch, I realized it had been many hours since breakfast and I had only eaten a few nuts on the way out. We had thought it would take two hours or so to make base camp and would eat lunch there. No wonder I was feeling weak and tired, beside the fact I had walked 8 mountain miles through deep snow. Mistake number 6. Never pack away all your food.

Ginger managed to find some snacks and we waited in comfortable warmth for a long time. The guys finally came back, with the chained up pickup, a chainsaw and a towing chain. Come to find out the road was full of downed trees, which they had to find their way over or around with the horses and cut out to get the pickup back to the trail head. They pulled the Jeep out and we finally made it to base camp. Only to find that the hunters, who had driven their own rig, had fled to safer ground.

“O-Kay,” John said, “On to Plan C.”

Eleven miles through hip deep snow on a treacherous mountain trail with nervous horses, novice horsemen, hypothermic weather conditions, no food, several dangerous incidents and seven people, eight horses and two dogs made it out safely with no serious injuries. That I would say was a God-thing. His angels were certainly surrounding us that day, whole legions of them, which we kept very busy.

“You have given me the shield of Your salvation. Your right hand has held me up (literally) Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me so my feet did not slip.” Ps. 18:35-36

In life when it seems impossible to go on, when I do not see a way, when the mountain is steep, the snow is deep, the trail is impassable, when I can not lift my feet for another step, when I fall off the trail, when I reach the end and find out it is not really the end, God makes a way. He lifts me up, He holds me, He gives me strength, He makes the trail wide so my feet do not slip. He makes a way where there is no way.

“He also brought me out, of the wilderness, into a broad place. He delivers me, always, because He delights in me.” Ps. 18:19 (my emphasis)
To be continued with part 2

Snowing and Misti

Snowing and Misti


Ginger in outhouse.

Ginger in outhouse.


Big Snow 04

Big Snow 05

More snow. Preparing to evacuate camp

More snow. Preparing to evacuate camp


John and me

John and me


Ginger and Dan getting ready to leave camp

Ginger and Dan getting ready to leave camp

Posted in Encouragement, God is my Deliverer | 7 Comments

Hunting Camp, Dudes and Horses

Posted on October 12, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

Mountains such as these

Mountains


SIT LIGHT IN THE SADDLE
Have you been on a mountain trail? In the kind of mountains that tower to the sky and wear white caps all year long? Where the clouds drape like a wedding dress and tail off the slopes like the veil? I’ve heard these trails called “foot trails”. I’ve always thought they were called this because—well you travel on them afoot.
The first time I ventured on one of these “foot” trails on horse back and we came to an open hillside with a rock slide and saw the narrow trail cutting a groove through a jumble of rocks on the side of a steep slope, I realized it was so named because the trail is barely a “foot” wide. And I was on a 1,300 pound animal with a spread of about two feet between his big pancake shaped hooves.
“And you want me to go across that!” I yelled at my friend who was confidently heading towards the rock slide.
“Just trust your horse,” he said, “give him his head and sit light in the saddle.” That was all. Nothing else. Nothing like “these animals are sure-footed; they can go across a mountain slope with no problem, blindfolded.”
“Shouldn’t I get off and lead him?” Was my next question to his back as he and his big horse drew closer to the precarious rocks.
“Nope, safer to stay on.”
Now I had been around horses all my life riding since before I could walk, but I guess you could say I was a flat-land rider. Oh when I was a kid I rode all over the gentle ridges and timbered hills of our place north of Spokane WA, and even in Alaska where the mountains are way too rugged to take horse into, I rode in fairly flat country. Nothing like these Montana mountains, steep rugged, rocky and seemingly not horse friendly.
However my friend did not think that was true. I held my horse back and watched as his gelding clomped calmly across the rock slide.
“Well,” I told Sparky, “if he can do it so can you. After all you’re a Morgan, strong, sure footed, calm and experienced on mountain trails. Right?”
For an answer Sparky stepped out confidently towards the rock slide. At first I watched his head, ears perked forward; stride long and sure, eager to catch up with the other horse. Then I looked down. Oh my goodness! Rocks, no make that boulders, were jumbled down, waaay down the steep slope, tumbling almost into the creek far below. Trees lined the small creek which was so shallow it would not break a fall if you stayed alive that long, which is doubtful. With never a hesitation, never a stumble, Sparky sauntered across that rocky, narrow trail as if it was a foot-path through a groomed golf course.
“Okay,” I called to my friend up ahead, “nothin’ to it!”

Many years and mountain trails later, John and I bought an outfitting business in the back country of the Bitterroot Mountains along the Montana-Idaho boarder. The trails in this rugged wilderness made that trail up Dry Creek crossing rock slides and winding up to Sacagawea Peak near Plains look like a walk in the park. Steep mountain slopes which seemed impossible for a horse had switch backs so tight you were nearly walking on the back of the horse below you. Muddy slopes that never dried up in the few weeks they were not covered by snow, sheer drops, deep canyons and yes, huge rock slides were some of the obstacles the trails traversed. Not to mention horse-belly deep, ice cold, rushing creeks to cross.
On our first scouting trip into that high country John and I were novice packers. He rode Rocket (now that’s reassuring) I rode big Sunny and we packed Blue. Blue in his beginning trips as a pack horse was, to put it mildly a pain in the butt! He did everything he shouldn’t, like dragging behind until he nearly pulled me out of the saddle or nipping the butt of the horse in front of him, acting crazy running around camp when he should have been grazing or crashing the pack saddle into one of our horses. We came up with the brilliant idea of letting him follow along on his own. He wouldn’t go anywhere, surely.
Breathlessly, without a thought of Blue who was supposedly behind me, I watched the trail ahead and sat light in my saddle as we rode across a very steep open, grassy mountain side. It was a long ways to the bottom and nothing to stop a horse if he should fall and roll. Nothing to it as long as we stayed on the trail right? A walk in the park. Just trust my horse. Give him his head and sit light in the saddle.
About half way across I heard a noise and looked up. There was Blue nonchalantly strolling across the slope directly above me, dipping his head now and then to grab some grass. It was so steep I was treated to a very good view of his underside. Then he trotted across the mountainside to catch up with Rocket, his pack bouncing and rocking but, thankfully, holding tight.
It was then that I realized just how sure footed a horse is and how adapt they are for those rugged mountain slopes and how much I did not have to worry about them falling. But still you hear stories of horses falling off trails and tumbling to the bottom of the canyon. You know it can happen.
Not long after this we had some clients on this same trail for a summer fishing trip and were going across this same open hillside. It had been a late spring and even though it was July the snow had barely gone off the high country. Some places the horses were walking through snow. Not only was the trail muddy going across this slope but the trail was sluffing off in places. So you trust your horse to stay on the trail but what happens when the trail is no longer there? When the ground gives out from under their hooves?
Our clients were a man and his daughter of 11 who had some limited riding experience. On the way up to the trail head the little sweetheart asked if there were outhouses, “I can use an outhouse now that Dad took me camping where there was one.” And if we had to ride down hills. Oh, oh!
“Umm, no outhouses I’m afraid, but there are trees.” Eyes widen. “And yesss there are hills,” I told her, “but all you have to do is trust your horse, give him his head and balance in the saddle.” She took to the great adventure with her daddy like a horse to green pastures. As we rode across that treacherous slope with the sides of the trail falling off beneath the horses hooves and clumps of dirt and grass rolling 300 yards to the bottom, she showed no fear.
I, on the other hand, was praying like crazy that her horse didn’t fall and I was sitting light, very light in the saddle, in fact all my weight was on the uphill stirrup. I wanted badly to get off since surely it would be safer in this situation to lead your horse. But with that little girl confidently trusting her horse as he scrambled for footing and grinning all the way, how could I do that?

One more story and we’ll get to the point. Sunny, my beautiful, powerful gelding had cut his leg badly on barbed wire. It was a hind leg at the hock and wasn’t healing very quickly. When it came time that summer to pack hay and feed into our two summer camps on high mountain lakes, we decided to use him as a pack horse since the vet said it would help to exercise the leg. I rode Blue, who was a trail-wise horse by now and much better to get along with, but still he was not my Sunny. I thought about switching saddles and riding Sunny on the trip out from the first camp, but decided against it.
The trail at one point, after going across rock slides, open slopes and sheer drops, angled down the side of a timbered canyon. The slope below us was steep with a couple hundred yards to the creek bottom.
Having become used to the precarious trails by now, I was relaxed as I breathed in the tangy scent of fir, cedar and larch trees and listened to the surrounding birdsong. Always when we were on the trail in the high country, the world flew away. Our thoughts were only on survival, taking care of the clients and our horses and outsmarting the fish or elk. Nothing more. Time, except for when the sun rose and when it set, had no meaning. It never failed, every time we headed up the timbered, quiet trail for the first time I could feel the cares and stresses of life slipping off my back like a heavy winter coat. Peace would flutter down like a parakeet and perch on my shoulders.
All of a sudden all that relaxed calmness plummeted to the canyon floor when Sunny, who I was leading, stepped off the trail. His injured hind leg went off and he didn’t have the strength to push himself back up. With an empty pack saddle he went down and rolled. Very quickly, before I had time to breath, he was down. Sitting light in the saddle or not, I doubt there was time to jump off.
He rolled once and came up against a log, lying on his back. Like I said, he was a big horse, probably weighing close to 1500 pounds and all that weight now rested on his lungs. He gasped in air, groaning with each labored breath.
“Do something,” I yelled as I jumped off Blue, “he won’t last long like that.” It was obvious he couldn’t roll up the slope and he was jammed against the log on the downside.
John calmly went to his horse and pulled out the small chainsaw he always carried in his scabbard. Calmly he choked it and did whatever you have to do when starting a chain saw and pulled the starter cord. Several times.
“Come on! Come on! start!” I prayed frantically. And about collapsed when it did. Calmly he began to cut the log right next to Sunny’s head.
I was a basket case, totally panicked. I ran around picking up sticks and tried to talk soothingly to the groaning horse who never moved a muscle or blinked an eye. In fact I covered his eyes with my hands to keep out saw dust.
Then John cut the other end of the log, while I continued to bustle around doing, I’m not sure what. Then John rolled the log away. I had no idea what would happen, in fact I envisioned Sunny rolling to the bottom of the canyon. But the horse who had lain motionless while a loud chainsaw was roaring right next to his ear, just calmly rolled over and stood up, pack saddle and all.
Then he began to eat. I was still throwing sticks out of the way clearing a path back to the trail.
That night I couldn’t sleep. I laid there in the small camping trailer at base camp and shook as I pictured myself underneath that big horse. There are stories. It can happen. Fear filled my heart like I had never felt before and I dreaded the trail we would have to take in the morning back up that mountain. I prayed but the fear was still there in the morning.
When I told John about it he said, “So are you just going to give up? Quit riding in the mountains? Or are you going to trust God?”
Talk about putting it out there. Plain and simple, I had a choice, give up or keep going and trust God.
Our lives are like those mountains, steep hillsides, sheer cliffs, huge boulders tumbling down the mountain until there’s a whole mountainside of jumbled rocks, slippery slopes, trails sluffing off, deep mud holes, rushing ice cold streams and horses that are less than perfect. There might be a big tree blocking the trail (thus the chainsaw) or snow drifts in the way, or possibly a bear ambling around the bend.
The weather can be wet or cold or snowy. Accidents can happen, incidents, like fire in tents do come along. (I’ll be writing about some of those down the road) Life is hard, things happen, tough things, ugly things, dark things, scary things. Like a horse laying on his back gasping for breath. Or worse, way worse, he could have been dead with a broken neck at the bottom of the canyon. With John or me lying still on the hillside.
So what do we do when the going is really rough? When we’re scared to get out of bed and face another day? When the trail gives out, when our horse falls? You know what John said when I told him I could have been under that horse? He said, “Well you weren’t.”
We get back on the horse and we ride. That’s what I did that next day. I sat light in the saddle going up that trail and my heart was pounding in my ears. When the trail got tough and the going was steep and muddy, I trusted my horse and I gave him his head. I looked up and I sang.

Trust takes tenacity. To trust no matter what happens. All the time. It’s a moment by moment choice. The trail changes every minute with twists, bends and steep slopes. Sometimes the slope is very slippery and my horse might fall. It can happen. Fear can keep me from doing what I want to do. Life gets tough, seems impossible, gets down right nasty and I just want to burrow under the covers and stay there, forever. I have a choice, give up or get going. Don’t give up, don’t let fear stop you. Get back in the saddle. Keep going.
“Truly my soul waits silently for God, from Him comes my salvation. He only is my Rock and my salvation. He is my defense. I will not be greatly moved!” Ps.62:1-2
Trust takes exertion. Lots of effort all the time. Choosing not to worry, calling out to Him when worry comes or the trail gets treacherous. Saying I trust You God to take care of it. Every time. Every single time you start to worry or fret put it in His hands. When you’re faced with an impossible cliff, a sheer drop off, or a sluffing trail, give it to Him and leave it there. Or put it right back. Into His hands. Look up. Don’t look at the trail. Keep your eyes on the sky!
“Be anxious for nothing. Pray about everything, and give thanks.” Pil. 4:6
Trust takes acceptance. The trail is going to be there. The mountains are rugged. The weather can be tough. Sometimes it rains for days and to stay dry you have to huddle in a two man tent. Sometimes your way is blocked by a tree or snow drift and you either cut it out of the way or take another trail. Or go back the way you came. Accidents happen. Horses fall. Snow piles up. That’s the way it is up there in the high country. It’s the way of the wilderness. That’s the way of life. God orchestrates our lives, if we are His children. Everything that happens to us comes through His hands. Nothing touches us that He does not allow, if we are following His trail. But if He allows it, there is a good reason. He loves us and works all things for our good, if we love Him. He has plans for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future. Sometimes those plans entail slippery slopes and mud holes that bog us down. Sometimes we lose the trail and grope in the dark, feeling out every step or crawling and clawing our way up the rock cliff. Sometimes life gets dark, but like Job we have to say, “will we accept the good and not the bad from Him?” Whatever comes, good or bad, small problem or huge, rain or shine, trust Him. Rely completely on His strength and deliverance. Yes I could have been under that horse, but God kept me safe. Just trust in your horse. Trust God every step of the way, finding shelter from the storms under His mighty wings, leaning on Him when the winds howl.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.” Prov. 3:5-6
Trust takes praise and thanksgiving. Even when to praise is the hardest thing of all. Being thankful for something is accepting a situation and saying if God allows it, its okay. When we praise God we put words to our faith. Grumbling complaining, resenting a situation cripples trust and steals joy. When I grumble or complain am I not saying that God doesn’t know what He’s doing? How can I be happy about the good times yet complain about the hard times? When my Father God orchestrates it all.
I can’t hold the reins tight. I have to give my horse his head to pick his way over the rough spots. I can’t squeeze my legs around him, I have to sit light in the saddle ready to move and balance when I need to. If I grumble and complain or fight God, I block His power. I hamper His movements. When I praise Him or thank Him I free Him to work His way in my life.
The all powerful, all mighty God of the universe, who holds the stars in place, holds me in His hands. ME. IN. HIS. HANDS. He will never let me go. My existence, my life is in His control. IF I give Him rein. I must put all my troubles, all my cares, all my fears, all my life in His hands. Every time I doubt. Every time I fret. Every time I worry. Every time I fear. And I must praise. Praise loosens my squeeze.
Roll your life on Him. Be ready to move when He moves and able to balance when He changes direction. Keep your eyes on Him, not the situation. Thank Him. Praise Him.
“I will praise You, O, Lord with my whole heart. I will tell of all your marvelous works. I will be glad and rejoice in You. I will sing praise to Your name O Most High!” Ps. 9:1
Trust God, give Him His head. Sit light in the saddle, look up and sing.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord and whose hope is in the Lord. For he shall be like a tree that is planted by the waters which spreads out it’s roots into the river. And he will not fear when heat comes but it’s leaves will be green. And he will not be anxious in a year of drought nor will he cease from yielding fruit.” Jeremiah 17:7-8

Posted in Praise, Trusting God | 4 Comments

Refiner

Posted on June 5, 2013 by Wendy Kleker
TENACIOUS

TENACIOUS

“For you, O Lord, have tested us. You refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net. You laid affliction on our backs. You have caused men to ride over our heads.
We went through the fire and through water, but You brought us out to rich fulfillment.” Ps. 66:10-12
Steel is made strong with fire and water. Gold and silver are purified or made perfect by fire.
“Count it all joy,” He says, “when you fall into various trials. The testing of your faith produces perseverance and endurance that you may be perfect and complete lacking in nothing.” from James 1:2-4
Perfect and complete, strong and tenacious because of hard times that draw us to Him. Rich in joy and peace when we abide close to His side, hiding under His wings, trusting Him always.

Posted in Preseverence, Refiner | 4 Comments

Trust 2

Posted on May 30, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

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Dove eggs

Dove eggs

Spring has sprung!

Spring has sprung!

Doti

Doti

SPRUNG BY AN ANGEL
by Wendy Kleker
“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Phil. 4:6-7

Peter was in prison again, for the third time since the death of his Lord. A few days earlier he stood in the crowd and watched as soldiers beheaded James the brother of John, by the command of Herod. Now Herod, having won the favor of the Jewish leaders with the execution of James, had commanded Peter to be put to death by the sword. However, it was Passover and there could be no slayings on Passover, so Herod put Peter in prison with 16 soldiers guarding him. Herod wanted to make sure that Peter’s friends would not spring him from jail, as it seemed they had done before.

Actually, it had been an angel who opened the prison doors for the apostles, and commanded they go preach words of life in the synagogue. To assure this did not happen again the guards had Peter take off his clothes and sandals, bound him in chains and two guards lay down beside him with more guarding the door.

Therefore, the last night of his life, Peter lay on the hard floor of the prison with hardly any clothes on his body and his feet and hands bound in heavy chains. The next morning he would be taken out before a crowd on the street, commanded to kneel, the sword would rise and his head would roll.

The end was near. Would it hurt? He must have wondered. Would it be quick? Would he be in the presence of His Lord and Savior in an instant? Stephen had seen the Lord standing on the right side of His Father just before he had been hit by the lethal rock, which ended his life. Would Peter see Jesus, his friend and teacher waiting for him?

What were Peter’s thoughts that night as he lay between the soldiers? Was he afraid? I would have been shaking so bad the chains would have rattled. Was he praying? I would have been praying and begging God the whole night through. Was he going over his life, making sure he had everything in order and his heart right with God? I would have been writing out my will and praying for salvation.

Peter was in dire straights. Granted he had seen miracles, but God had not delivered James, or Stephen from death. God might not deliver Peter. He might call Peter home. This could be his time to die. This very likely could be his last night on earth. Fear. Heart-pounding-spine-tingling-hair-raising fear should have kept him awake.

However, Peter was not doing any of these things and he was not laying awake. It says he was sleeping! Yes sleeping, bound with two chains between two soldiers. How in the world on the night before his head was to be cut off was he sleeping? And not just dozing either. He was in a deep sleep.

In the darkness of the cell, a bright light appeared and an angel of the Lord stood beside Peter, but Peter slept on. The angel had to strike him on the side to wake him up, and still Peter was groggy. The angel picked Peter up, the chains fell off Peter’s limp form and the angel said, “Wake up Peter! Stand up! Be strong! What’s the matter with you, come on get your sandals on, put your clothes on, we have to move, man!”

Peter had been sleeping so soundly and was so groggy that he thought it was all a dream and not really happening. Now that is trust.

“Be anxious for nothing,”

Be anxious for nothing means NOTHING! Even in dire straights; even when everything looks bleak and dark; even when fear pumps through me; even when going through a great loss; even in chains facing execution; even facing grave danger.

“In EVERYTHING with prayer and thanksgiving pour out your heart to God.” Give it to the God of the Universe. Put it in the hands of the King of Kings. Leave it there. And go to sleep. A sleep so deep the brilliant light of an angel in the dark of night doesn’t wake you.

Every time I doubt, every time I worry, every time I am afraid, EVERY single time I need to give it to Him. Letting God be God, letting Him take care of it, leaning on him, believing He will deliver me, either here on earth or in Heaven. Not worrying, not fretting, not doubting, but praying and believing. Every time. That is trust.

“And God’s peace that is beyond all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

Like the manna that the Israelites gathered each morning just enough for each person for that day, God gives me just enough peace for the moment, not enough for tomorrow, or even for an hour from now. Peter had enough peace to fall asleep in a dark, dank cell with no clothes, chains on his arms and feet, and a death sentence looming. That’s the peace that guarded his heart and mind that night. That’s the peace that floods my heart when I trust Him.

“With thanksgiving–” Giving thanks, I feel, is the key to the peace that passes all understanding. If I am thankful, I have a hard time fretting. If I can say thank you for not only the answer I am hoping for, but for whatever He brings or allows, I will not doubt. That is trust.

Peter’s friends stayed awake all night praying, probably not necessary, they could have gone to sleep. They prayed all night yet, when Rhoda told them the one they prayed for was at the door, they thought she was crazy. “Your beyond yourself,” they said, “You are dreaming! It must be his angel and he is dead.” They did not really believe God would answer their prayers.

How typical is this of me? I pray and don’t really believe God will answer. I don’t trust. I need to be like Peter, give it to God, leave it there and go to sleep. Not pray and stay awake all night fretting and worrying. Pray and let it go. Give it to God and go to sleep. Every time. That’s trust.

“Surely he will never be shaken. The righteous will be in everlasting remembrance. He will not be afraid of evil tidings, his heart is steadfast, trusting the Lord. His heart is established. He will not be afraid.” Ps. 112:7

Read Acts 12:1-18

Posted in God is faithful, Letting go, NO Fear, No Worry!, Thanksgiving, Trusting God | 2 Comments

RENEWAL

Posted on April 30, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

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SPRING FORTH

“They shall feed along the roads, and their pastures shall be on all desolate heights. They shall neither hunger nor thirst, neither heat nor sun shall strike them, for He who has mercy on them will lead them, even by springs of water He will guide them.
I will make My mountains a road, and My highways shall be not be mired in mud” (from Is. 49:9-11)

The wind howling around the house sounds cold and chilling. Snow fills the air and is plastered on the window screens. Cold seeps through the old walls as drifts pile high against the buildings. Winter coming again in April is not a welcome sight. Snow and cold seem to be all that we will ever have. Spring is supposed to be here, but it doesn’t look like spring out my window this morning. It looks bleak and frozen, just like January. How I long for bright sunshine on my face and warm breezes on my cheek. Spring is long in coming this year. Storm after snowstorm blows into our area. How long will the cold and dark of winter go on?
But wait! Is that green grass I see? Just a glimpse in the bare spots where the snow has blown off? Is that my irises poking out of the snow by the house? Wait a minute I see a Robin! One Robin! No there’s two! A bunch of Robins huddled on the fence looking miserable but waiting patiently for the sunshine and that worm to come out.

Isn’t that the song of a Meadow Lark? “Spring is coming soon! Spring is coming soon!” Yes! The light brown bird with yellow on his wing, the cheerleader of the prairie, sings in the middle of the storm. The harbingers of spring, the birds, the green shoots of grass, and the first sprouts of spring flowers bringing hope of new life are really there to be seen if only I look close enough.

Sure enough days later, weeks later, when the storms move on and the breezes feel warm on my face, the snow begins to melt. Soon green grass is showing everywhere and when I am out on a walk I see a wild crocus coming up getting ready to bloom. The sun shines, the wind is warm and welcoming, birds sing, Meadow Larks are on the prairie again, the geese honk as they fly over going north, and the other day I saw a big flock of cranes high over head, flying north. A sure sign that spring is indeed here. Suddenly, life comes back to the frozen, winter-locked prairie. The mule deer are once more in our yard, bunnies bounce across the hills, baby calves are in the fields, antelope are seeking places to drop their calves, birds are building nests, sharptails and pheasants are pairing up and nesting, even toads and frogs are singing in the night. Life and growth abounds. Hope springs forth.

This past year, since March 10th, 2012 has been a long, dark and sometimes very cold winter in my life. Oh, there have been warm times when southern winds blew wonderful things into my life. There has been renewal and growth and sweet communion with my Lord and Savior, but the harsh winds seemed to blow unceasingly and the cold fingers of deep freeze were wrapped tightly around my heart. Sometimes life seems so dead and the future hopeless. How long will this season of winter go on? Is there no hope?

Wait a minute! Is that not a glimmer of hope I see? A Son ray shining in the darkness? Have I not seen treasures in darkness? And found hidden riches in secret places? Has He not made darkness light before me? And crooked places straight?
“Behold I will do a new things,” says the Lord, “Now it shall spring forth!”

A new thing! Forget the old, He says, don’t even consider former things. The way things were before my son died are no more. Don’t even consider them, they are no more. However, this winter will pass and new things will spring forth. New life, new growth, new love.

“I see it Lord! I see the beginnings of new life! The old has passed away but the new comes! You bring the blind (me) by a way I did not know and you lead me in paths I have not yet known. You open gates and double doors; You go before me and make crooked paths straight. You make a way, Lord, You make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. You will do it!

Spending Easter with my Grandkids was a life giving time. Seeing their enthusiasm and excitement for the celebration of the resurrection of our Savior brought sunshine into our lives. John was no longer the only one to get excited about coloring eggs and the Great Easter Egg Hunt! Seeing their hunger for Godly things and the word of God was like a warm breeze blowing in our faces. They are like sponges soaking up the teachings of Jesus! To see the joy and love in young eyes when they realize what Jesus did for them and how wide, how deep, how high is His love, is like a bird song in my heart.

God, You do not forsake us to winter’s freeze! You will not forsake me ever! You say “Trust Me! I will open rivers in desolate high places where there is only rock and sky. I will cause fountains to come forth in the valleys and in the wilderness, springs of living water for my Children I will create. I will plant trees of all kinds in the desert and the wilderness. I will make a new planting for my Glory. Behold I will do it!”

The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. And the Lord gives again. And again. We lost my son, a special thing, from this world, but God gives new life, new hope, new growth. I learn new dimensions of trust and leaning on my Jesus. I see His glory, I learn to bask in His light, I understand that praising Him opens the doors of Heaven and I focus completely on His presence. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my son is with his Savior in Glory. I am certain that God never leaves me or forsakes me. He is with me always even to my gray hairs, even through my old age when I have no son to take care of me, He will carry me. He says, “I have made you I will bear you! I will even carry you and I will deliver you always!” (from Is. 46:4)

To be with our Grandkids, to experience their joy, their enthusiasm for life, to see them grabbing onto the things I love, brings springtime to my soul. The winter season always passes. Green grass grows, birds come, flowers bloom, warm breezes blow, life is renewed. He leads us down new roads of adventure and opens ways that have been blocked. Behold He will do a new thing. Now it shall springs forth!
Read Isaiah 41:17-20, 42:16, 43:18-19, 45:1-2 (all scripture references from these verses)

Posted in Encouragement, Loss of a child, New things, Renewal, Spring | 1 Comment

TRUST 1

Posted on April 25, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

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Joy Robbers Peace Smashers

      One night I lay in bed with my heart quaking in fear.  What I was afraid of I wasn’t sure.  Fear for John, “what if one day he did not come home?”  Fear from my grandkids, “how many nights will I lay awake wondering, worrying about them?  Worrying if they are safe or will something terrible happen to them like it happened to my son?”

            Fear.  I hate fear.  Fear and worry are joy robbers and peace smashers!

            “Lord,” I whispered in the night, “I can take the rest; the grief, the heartache, but I hate the fear.  The worry that drags me down.  If only I didn’t have to feel this fear and worry.”

            “You don’t, My child.  You do not need to worry.  I can banish fear from your heart.  Only trust Me.”

            I try to trust, but the fear creeps in.  The worry seeps into my mind like a dense fog, slowly blanketing the joy and smothering my peace. 

            “What can I do, Lord?  How can I keep the fog from obscuring Your joy?”

            “Give Me your fears.  Hand your concerns to Me and leave them in My hands.  Why would you worry when you know I am in control of all things?”

            “Because bad things happen,” the conversation went on in my mind“, and it terrifies me.  I don’t want to be knocked down again.”

            “Do you believe I work all things for your good?”

            “Yes”

            “Do you believe I have a plan to prosper you and not for evil?”

            “Yes.”

            “Do you believe though darkness may come I am the Light?”

            “Yes”

            “Do you believe if you fall I will pick you up, always and carry you in my hand?”

            “Yes, of course, Lord. You’ve done it many times.”

            “Evil is in the world, but I overcome the world.  When you are knocked down, I pick you up.  When the mountain is steep, I carry you.  When the way is dark, I hold your hand and light your path. When there’s a mighty storm, I shelter you under my wings.  When evil comes against you I surround you with angels. 

            Don’t you know, Child, when bad things happen that’s when you must trust more?  Cling tighter?  Lean harder?”

            “Oh yes, Lord, I do know that.”

            “I don’t promise flat ground or an easy race, but I do ask that you run with endurance the race I set before you.  And I do promise to be with you for all of the race.  Do you believe that?”

            “Yes, Lord, I surely do.”

            “Then Rejoice and be glad with all your heart.  I, the Lord am in our midst.  I have cast out your enemy.  You shall fear disaster no more.  Sing o daughter of Zion. I will surely give you a song.”  (from Zephaniah 3:14-15)

 

            Sometimes I feel I have to worry.  If I didn’t it means, I don’t care. That is a lie given to me by Satan.  Worry is engrained in us, second nature that just happens, but God says not to worry about tomorrow that this day will bring enough trouble of its own.  He doesn’t say we won’t have trouble just not to worry or be anxious or let fear dwell in our minds.  I can have victory over worry and fear.  They do not need to reign in my life.  My Father Almighty God reigns and He throws out my enemies.  Fear, Worry, and Anxiety.  They’re gone.  Exterminated!  Over thrown!  Beat down!  Taken care of by my the Mighty One.  He is in my midst and He, the Mighty One will save! (Zeph. 3:16-17)

            All I have to do is trust.  Lean.  Depend on my God.  Sound easy?  Yeah. 

            The secret to standing my ground is dwelling every day in His secret place.  The place close to His side.  Making Him my refuge, my dwelling place.  He will set me upon a high Rock.  I will call upon Him and he will answer.  He will be with me in trouble.  He may not keep me out of trouble, but He will be with me always.  He will deliver me and honor me.  He will give me long life and will satisfy me with all good things.  His good things, which are by far, better than what I think is good.  (Ps. 91)

            No matter what happens; no matter where I am; no matter what I must endure; no matter what trial comes upon me, I must trust my God.  I must call upon His name.  The name of Jesus is all I need.  Worry and fear will not have a place in my mind.  I will pour out my troubles to God,  I will place them in His mighty hands and I will leave them there.  I will trust His power.  I will hide under His wings.  I will take refuge in the secret place.  The place of trust.  Trusting God through all things. 

            I will hear His voice when He whispers in the night:  “”because you, Wendy, love Me, I will rescue you.  I will protect you for you call my name.  You will call upon Me and I will answer you.  I will be with you in trouble.  I will deliver you and honor you with long life.  I will satisfy you and show you my salvation.”  (from Ps. 91:14-16)

 He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.  I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust”.  Ps. 91:1-2

Posted in Encouragement, God is in my midst, God is my Deliverer, NO Fear, No Worry!, Stand Firm, Trusting God | Leave a comment

The War 8 NO RETREAT

Posted on March 15, 2013 by Wendy Kleker
My Rock

My Rock

NO RETREAT

“I will not leave you nor forsake you.  Be strong and of good courage, do not be afraid nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:5&9

            Even after a victory and maybe because of the victory Satan gets in his licks.  He tries to discourage and make me despair once again.  His desire is to take away the light, to banish my joy and stomp my peace.  Satan will storm the castle and knock down my defenses with a battering ram.  He will come and he will fight.  But I will stand in the power of my God!

            So after my incredible mountain top experience, darkness threatened to come again and the heaviness of despair moved in like a fog.  Like an ice storm with drizzly mist and dreary fog, the sorrow blew into my heart.  The wind blasted particles of ice against my face and depression weighed heavy on my mind. 

            As I walked across the field, my weary feet were dragging, my knees were weak and my hands hung down.  My mind struggled with the questions once again and circled the what-ifs over and over.  I felt the weight of despair crushing me. 

            But God!  I cried, “I thought I had victory over this!” 

            Two words came to my mind and I stopped. 

            “No Retreat!” 

            I stared at the frozen ground.

            “Hold your ground!  No Surrender!”

            I lifted my face to gray sky and felt the wind blast it with pieces of ice.  Daring the dark cloud of despair to crush me, I thrust my fist to the sky.  Then I said, “I will not give up the ground I have gained.  I have seen God’s glory.  I have been in the Light.  I have felt His peace and His joy.  I have experienced utter trust and confidence.  I will not go to the darkness!  I will not surrender!  I will not give up the ground I gained!”

            I marched across the field with my fist in the air and shouted, “No Retreat!  No Retreat!  No surrender!”

            I will stand on the power of my Lord!  I will not let Satan have his way.  Let the tears come, let the wave of pain flood my heart, but despair will not overshadow my life and I will not walk in the darkness. 

            Greif is normal after a great loss.  Weeping comes in the night, but the cloud of despair is from Satan.  He would want me bowed down and defeated.  I will grieve, yes, but despair, no!  Let the tears flow, but I will not be weighed down with heaviness.  Let the memories come, but I will not let darkness invade my world.  I will not go there. 

            When the pain comes, and come it will, when the darkness threatens to press in, when despair crashes the door, I will stand my ground and I will cry, “NO RETREAT!

            Joy comes in the morning!  God gives joy and peace!  He will push back the darkness with the light of Glory.  I will get through the pain with tears streaming down my face and praise on my lips.  I will fight despair with the sword of truth, God’s word and promises.  I will cry  NO RETREAT!

            Let the tears flow.        

            Let the thunder roll. 

            Let the mighty winds blow!

            I will fall on my knees and I will lean on my Jesus. 

            I will hunker under His wings and I will trust in His name.

            I will stand on the truth and I will soar on His praises.

            I will sing in His light.

            I will run in His strength

            I will dance with His joy.

            I will stand firm with His power,

            and with confident trust, I will fight!

            I will cry No Retreat!  No Retreat!  No Retreat!

            “He Teaches my hands to make war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.  You, God, have given me the shield of Your salvation.  Your right hand has held me up; Your gentleness has made me great.  You enlarge the path under me so my feet did not slip.

I have pursued my enemies and over taken them.  Neither did I turn back again till they were destroyed.” 

NO RETREAT!

“I have wounded them, so that they could not rise. They have fallen under my feet.”

NO RETREAT!

“For You have armed me with strength for the battle!”

NO RETREAT!

“The Lord lives!  Blessed be my Rock!  Let the God of my salvation be exalted!”

Ps. 18:32-39, 46

The Light comes

The Light comes

   

After the ice storm

After the ice storm

Posted in Encouragement, God Fights the battles, God has the victory, Mighty to save, No Retreat!, No Surrender, Praise, Rejoicing in Grief, Stand Firm, Trusting God | 11 Comments

THE WAR 7 The Battle Belongs to God

Posted on February 24, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

I wrote this in 2012, many months after my son went Home to Glory.  I just reread it so thought I would share it again.


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THE BATTLE BELONGS TO GOD

 “Then all the people shall know that the Lord does not save with a sword and spear for the battle is the Lord’s and He will give you into our hands!” 1Sam. 17:4

Joshua

            Fear roared through the land of Canaan like a mighty title wave.  Two major cities had been utterly destroyed, all the people and their kings completely wiped out.  Another royal city, Gibeon had turned coat tails and signed a peace treaty with the invaders.  These no-bodies who had come out of no-where who claimed to be the people of a non-existent God, the One and Only God, were creeping over the land like a mighty swarm of grasshoppers intensely bent on gobbling up all who inhabited Canaan.  The kings of the land would not stand for this outrage, they would band together, thousands and millions of them coming together to wipe out first the turncoats of Gibeon, then this-this militant band of migrants who had invaded their land.

Joshua, the leader of the Israelites, God’s chosen people, did not hesitate to march to Gibeon’s aid, but not before he heard the council of the Lord’s voice.

“Do not fear them for I have delivered them into your hand, not a man will stand against you.”

Hard to believe when most of the armies of the land were gathering, but Joshua, having learned a previous lesson about not listening to his Commander in Chief, did not pause, or stop.  He marched the great army of God’s elect all night long.

Suddenly, when the men’s feet were dragging and their eyes drooping from no sleep, they came upon the enemy.  Thousands upon thousands of men, stretching as far as the eye could see in all directions around them, like sands on the sea shore, bristling with spears like a giant porcupine.

Can you imagine?  Joshua’s heart must have stopped beating for an instant when he saw the multitude of fighting men gathered around the city. He had a great army and they were brave and fearsome, but they were also like one grain of sand on that proverbial sea shore.

However, Joshua did not stop and he did not run, for he knew he had more than just these men behind him.  His Commander in Chief had told him to march against this army and Joshua knew the Almighty’s powerful army was flanking them and would somehow deliver His people.

“So, the Lord routed them before Israel and killed them with a great slaughter.”

Can you see it?  Early morning skies are laden with dark clouds.  Thunder rumbles over head as the army of Israel is spotted.  There is a great shout, an enraged battle cry that completely drowns out the thunder as the massive congregation of armies charges towards the invaders.  Victory is a sure thing given the many numbers of soldiers.  It would not take long to wipe these impertinent invaders off the face of the earth.

Suddenly, hail falls from the sky, pinging off the armor of the soldiers, stinging their faces.  The hail becomes larger, clanging off the helmets, bruising shoulders and arms even through the armor.  Then giant hail stones fall from the heavens hitting the heads of men, knocking them down, smashing them into the earth, killing many.  More men die from the hail stones than from the swords of the children of Israel.

God fought for Israel that long day when the sun stood still and He won.

Many fierce and mighty enemies are out there that we face every day.  Seemingly huge armies coming against us, odds totally not in our favor as we face completely impossible circumstances.  Disease, sickness, injuries, great losses, depression, despair, fear, anxiety, worry, stress, distresses, sin, addictions and certainly not the least Satan and his legions march to overcome us.

God says, “March, fight, go out against these enemies and I will be with you.  Do not fear them, I will deliver them into your hands.  I will break down doors of iron before you.  I will make a way where there seems to be no way.  I will conquer your enemy.  I am the Deliverer.”

He is with us in battle He commands the mighty armies of Heaven, He is our Commander in Chief, He fights with us and for us.  He will win. (from Joshua 10:1-14

Jehoshaphat

            Zoom ahead to another time, another battle, another man of God.  The Moabites, the Ammonites, and many other Ites joined together to battle Jerusalem and the nation of Judah.  King Jehoshaphat heard that this massive army, a “great multitude” was marching against him and he cried out, “OH MY GOD! What do we do?”

Oh, he was greatly afraid, no doubt, but he set himself to seek the Lord.  First and foremost, before anything else, Jehoshaphat sought the Lord.  He declared a fast through out the land.  He called a gathering to pray for help from the Lord.  From all over, out of all the cities and countryside Judeans, came to pray and seek the Lord.

In front of the assembly, in the house of the Lord, Jehoshaphat stood in the new court and poured his heart out to God.

“Oh God of our fathers,” he cried, “we have no power against this great multitude that is coming against us.  There is no way we can successfully fight such a great number.  We don’t know what to do!  But, our eyes are on You, our God. We trust you.”

“Now all Judah, their little ones, their wives and their children stood before the Lord.”  The Spirit of God fell on a man in their midst and out of the hush of earnest prayer, he spoke, “this is what the Lord says ,Do not be afraid or dismayed because of this great multitude for the battle is not yours, but God’s!” Heads came up and all eyes were on this young man as collectively they held their breath.  “You will not need to fight this battle.  Only go out, position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord.  Do not fear or be dismayed tomorrow go out against the great army for the Lord is with you!”

There was utter silence.  Jehoshaphat bowed his face to the ground and all Judah and Jerusalem bowed to the Lord and worshiped Him.

Then they shouted!  Can you imagine the great shout that must have gone up to God?  Praises to their awesome God!  With voices loud and high!  Wow!  What a sound that must have been.

The next morning they went before the massive invading army.  But they weren’t praying or petitioning God.  They weren’t crying or whining for help.  They weren’t shouting insults or yelling battle cries.  No, they were shouting praises to God!  And singing, “Praise to the Lord!  For His love endures forever!”

It says, “Now when they began to sing and to praise, the Lord set ambushes against the people of Ammon, Moab and MountSeir and they were defeated”.

Do you suppose their singing and joyous praise confused the enemy?  I’m not sure what happened, but as the army of Judah stood still singing and watching, the enemy armies turned on each other!  And utterly destroyed EACH OTHER!  Amazing!

Sometimes God tells us to stand firm.  To take up our postion of trust in our mighty God and stay still. He does call us to praise Him.  Before the outcome of the battle.  Before we know what will happen.  No matter what will happen, we need to praise God.  And sing.

The battle is not ours to fight.  God is not only with us in battles, but sometimes He fights the battle.  The battle belongs to God.  (from 2 Chronicles 20:1-30)

 Hezekiah

            Fast forward again to yet another threat on Judah.  Once again, a massive army is marching to lay siege on the city of Jerusalem. The king of Assyria is throwing out threats against the land of Judah.

Upon hearing this, Hezekiah, the current king of Judah, fortifies the city and builds up his army and his arms.  He tells his captains, “Be strong and courageous do not be afraid nor dismayed before all these multitudes coming against us for there are more with us than with them.  With them is an arm of flesh, mere men, but with us is the Lord our God to help us and to fight our battle.”

Sennacherib, king of Assyria tries the inside tactic by sending a messenger into the city to spread false teachings trying to turn the people against their king and their God.  This might have worked for his arguments were persuasive and made sense.  However, Hezekiah and Isaiah, the prophet, pray earnestly, crying out to God for help.

God sends an angel, one angle only, who swoops down on the army of the Assyrians where they are camped around the city of Jerusalem and he cuts down every mighty man of valor and captain in the camp.

Can you imagine it?  Suddenly a giant, white, winged being plummets from the heavens bringing death and destruction in his wake.  This mighty, gleaming angel pounces on the unsuspecting men and wipes out the whole army in one swipe.  Wow!  Did the people in Jerusalem see this?  What a sight it must have been.  Completely amazing!  (from 2Chorn. 32:1-23)

Sometimes God literally wipes out our enemies with His own army.  Or one angel.  We stand by opened mouthed and watch while the God of the universe takes care of our problems.  Just like that.

Maybe not always the way we envision it, or how we would want Him to take care of things, but He always delivers His children out of their tribulations.

Sometimes it may be by taking them Home.  It says, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”  (Ps. 116:15)  Precious in Webster’s is: Highly prized, valuable, greatly esteemed, beloved, cherished, sensitive.

In other words:  Greatly esteemed, cherished, valuable, in the eyes of the Lord is the death of His children.  He takes them home to be with Him for ever and ever.  How better of a deliverance can we ask for?

Sometimes God wishes His children to go through and face great trials, to build our faith to strengthen us, to bring us ever closer to Him, enabling us to see and experience His love and His Glory.  (from James 1:2-4 1 Peter 4:12-13)

So, there is a time for us to go out and fight.  He is with us in the battle lending His strength to our arms and feet, delivering our enemies into our hands and giving us power to overcome.

There is a time when God fights our battles.  He wants us to take our position of trust in Him and stand firm. The battle is not ours to fight, it belongs to God.

There is a time when God sends His mighty armies, His angels, to literally wipe out the enemy.  He wants us to wait, watch and see what He will do.

In all of these stories, the men of God turned to the Lord.  I need to give it to God, first and foremost.  And leave it in His capable hands.  Invariably I take it back.  So I need to give it to Him again. And again.  As many times as it takes, I need to pour my heart out to God, give it to Him and let Him be God. Then praise Him and sing.  There is something powerful in singing to God.  If nothing else, it keeps my mind off of my circumstances and my focus on Him.  Praise Him before I see the outcome.  Before I see the victory.  Because Victory I will indeed see.

He is my help.  He will fight the battle.  I may need to fight or I might need to stand firm.  He will let me know which it is I should do.  Whether He is fighting alongside of me or wiping out my enemy, He will conquer.  He is my Deliverer. He will have the victory!  The battle belongs to the Lord!

There was a great army after Elisha and many chariots and horses surrounded the city where he lived.  When his servant saw the massive army he cried, “What shall we do! So Elisha answered, “Do not fear for those who are with us are more than those who are with them. Elisha prayed and said, Lord I pray open his eyes that he may see.  Then the Lord opened the eyes of the young man and he saw.”  And behold this is what he saw. Covering the mountain were a multitude of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. The army of the Living God ready to fight!  Amazing!  (from 2 Kings 6:14-18)

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Posted in Battle Ground, Encouragement, Go out and Fight, God Fights the battles, God has the victory, God is in my midst, God is my Deliverer, Praise, Stand Firm, The Battle Belongs to the Lord | 2 Comments

The War 6 VICTORY

Posted on February 14, 2013 by Wendy Kleker

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VICTORY

“Oh God,” David cried, “You have cast us off, You have broken us down, You have been greatly displeased with us!  Oh God, I plead, restore us again!”

            The unbelievable has happened.  The great warrior whom God placed on the throne of Israel, the man after God’s own heart, God’s chosen one, King David and his mighty men have lost a battle.  It was a terrible defeat for the nation of Israel was greatly shaken.  David, who had previously experienced much hardship and oppression, felt as if the earth itself shook to the very core and would surely break into pieces.

            “Heal its breaches, for it is shaking,” he cried to his God.  “You have shown Your people hard things, You have made us drink the wine of confusion.”

            After my son’s death, I looked over a battlefield strewn with the devastation of war and aftermath.  Broken hearts, wounded souls, dashed hopes, smashed dreams and shredded lives.  God made my world tremble indeed everything was shaking under my feet and my very life was torn apart. 

            You have broken me, Lord, brought me to my knees for sure.  You have gone to the very core of my being and ripped out the gold, taken what was precious and valuable to my heart.  You left me reaching for Your hand, seeking Your face, needing Your strength, longing for Your love and desiring Your Presence.

            My God, You have let me and my loved ones stagger around in a confused daze wondering where You are in all of this.

            But wait! Does David see a glimmer of hope in the darkness?   

            “You have given a banner to those who fear you!”  Is there yet a light shinning in the night?

            “That it may be displayed because of the truth!”  Does David see God even in the gloom of defeat?

            “That Your beloved may be delivered!” Do I hear him pouring out his heart to God with confidence?

            “Save us, Oh God, with your righteous right hand and hear me!” 

            David trusts his God.  His strength lies in his confidence in the mighty Creator of all things. He is indeed confident that his Lord will give them the banner of victory.  The flag of Israel will fly over the army of God’s elect once again!  This David knows because he has heard God’s voice. 

             He says, “God has spoken in His holiness.  Therefore, I will rejoice!”

            Yes, there has been a great defeat in my life.  The armies of Satan and evil have come against me and have delivered a great blow.  A startling loss it  has been for all of us who were close to my son.  We were smashed, trampled, and left reeling in confusion and grief.  Darkness seemed to have gained the upper hand.

            But wait!  There is a Light shining in the darkness.  The Light leads me to the truth.  The Light will overcome the darkness now and forever. There is a flag of victory flying over our heads.  Our banner of faith and trust in our Almighty God stands tall and sure even in the smoke and fire of battle.

            Now I stand on that hill and look upon a field of victory!   I have seen the Glory of the Lord and have heard His voice. I will rejoice.

            God treads down our enemies. He is our Deliverer and He is standing by.  The battle belongs to Him and through Him, we will do valiantly!  He is in our midst and He has the victory!

            People raise your fists to the sky!  Lift your voices in praise! Rejoice!  He has won! The banner that flies over us says “YAH, The Lord!”

            It is His banner and all Mighty God, the King of Kings has claimed us for His own.  We are His and His banner will never be torn down.  He holds us in His righteous right hand forever and ever.  No one can take us from His hand.  He is the Restorer, the Healer and the Lover of our souls.

            The war will go on.  The final victory after the last skirmish of death will be when I walk through those shimmering gates.  When I see my Saviors sweet face, when I hug my son and greet many dear loved ones.  When I grab Stephen’s hand and fly across those hills of gold.  When I sing praises to my God forever and ever.

Holy  Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almight!

Through God we will do valiantly! 

“You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.  Trust in the Lord forever, for in Yah, the Lord, is everlasting strength, the rock of ages.” Is. 26:3-4    

Read Psalms 60

And the Light Shines!

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Posted in Battle Ground, Encouragement, God Fights the battles, God has the victory, God is in my midst, God is my Deliverer, His Banner, The Light and Truth | 1 Comment